The Brotherhood of the BoxerBriefs
by superguy
Summary: When a pair of lilaccolored boxerbriefs comes into the possession of five Hogwarts students, nobody thinks twice. But when the underwear gives the wearer certain powers over people, everyone fights for the pair.
1. Five Friends, One Pair

The Brotherhood of the Boxer-Briefs 

a harry potter fanfiction

superguy

1

Five Friends, One Pair 

None of the five boys were quite sure how it happened, but were just sure that it did. Of course, living in a world drenched with magic daily and constantly, the event or discovery shouldn't have been as impressive as it was. But, however it happened, the friends were glad that it did.

Brotherhood is a word commonly used to describe the close relationship between two men who are not related by bloodline. Having to share a dorm day and night, all five did consider their relationship a brotherhood.

Harry was the leader of the five. Having dark and almost unruly hair with the accessory round, thick-rimmed glasses, those on the outside of the brotherhood wouldn't have guessed the unlikely boy was at the front of the line. However, escaping death on multiple occasions was great enough to be deemed leader.

Second to Harry was his right-hand man, Ron. Possessing flaming red hair and a head above everyone in height, Ron and Harry were almost inseparable since the day they met. Accompanying his comrade on all of his adventures, Ron earned the spot of second in command.

Next in line was Dean. A very striking boy, his good looks and charming personality had landed him the role of announcer for the Quidditch matches at the school. This was just as good as being a rock star, so Dean naturally came next.

Behind him was Neville. A chubby yet mouse-ish young man, Neville's personality did not make him the most popular boy in the group, but the loyalty and earnest attitude presented to the others gave him a spot in the group.

And lastly was of course Seamus. Although his funny way with words and sense of humor was extremely likable, Seamus had been a rebel with the other four, but had a good history with each of them. So, last but not least, he concluded the brotherhood.

Now, this is where their story begins. Strange as it may be, it was certainly a turning point in each of their lives. This is where the boxer-briefs come in.

Rain pelted the large windows of the boys' dormitory, just to the right off the spiral staircase. Later in the evening, everyone was sent to his or her rooms to get rest for the upcoming day.

But not everybody was asleep.

In the Gryffindor tower, the five friends lay awake. Each was bored out of their minds.

"I can't sleep!" moaned Dean and everyone agreed.

"It's this stupid rain." Ron commented as he sat up on his four-poster, throwing his maroon curtains open to look at each of his friends. "Makes a horrible racket."

Harry seemed the only one who had something to keep his mind occupied. A book was propped open at the head of his own bed and he – with pillow tucked beneath his chin – read silently.

"Good book?" Ron asked.

Harry looked as though he were falling asleep.

"Not really."

"Oh…Got anything to talk about?"

Neville sat up, holding his teddy bear against his chest.

"I sort of do."

Everyone looked over at him. He froze.

"Well?"

"I…my Gran is sending me another Remembrall."

Ron rolled his eyes.

"That's…great, Neville."

Suddenly, Seamus got to his feet and Ron's eyes went wide.

"Seamus! What the bloody hell happened to your boxers!"

Glancing over at him, everyone could see that the usually light blue boxers were charred black and the buttocks had the beginnings of holes in them.

"I…I sat on some potion in Snape's class today. It charred my robes…and…and boxers."

All four of his friends could see the tears welling in his eyes and their hearts went out to him. Harry got to his feet and tried to comfort his friend.

"There, there. It's okay. We all lose something…precious…sometime or another."

"But these were my favorite!" Seamus wailed and sobbed into Harry's shoulder.

"Don't you have another pair?" Neville asked.

"No," Seamus began, blowing his nose. "This was my only pair. Mum magicked them so that they'd always stay clean."

Everyone comforted their comrade for a minute.

Then, Dean snapped his fingers.

"I have a pair you can use!"

He hurried to open his trunk and began rummaging through it. Everyone watched as he pulled something out and handed it to Seamus.

Seamus gawked.

"What is this?"

In his hands was a pair of pink boxer-briefs that appeared really small. Almost too small for him.

"They're boxer-briefs. I know – the color. But, I found them at this Muggle thrift store. They were a bargain! Just – give them a try."

Seamus still gawked, but pulled off his own blue boxers (barely blue now) and set them atop his bed neatly. Then, stepping one foot in then the other, he pulled the boxer-briefs on.

The whole room was in awe. Not only did the underwear fit, it fit like a glove.

"Holy cow!" Seamus exclaimed. "I look like a Kalvin Klein model!"

Indeed he did.

"Wait a second!" Harry interrupted suddenly. "Those were way too small to fit you before! There must be something wrong with them!"

Seamus stepped back, guarding the underwear.

"You're just jealous that they make me look h-o-t."

"No!" Harry insisted. "Here, let me try them on."

And so he did. When he turned to face them, everyone gasped.


	2. Curiouser and Curiouser

2

Curiouser and Curiouser

"Wow!" Harry said. "They fit like a glove! I almost feel like I'm not wearing anything at all!"

"That's not surprising," Ron said, the one of the group who was normally prone to intense fits of jealousy. "You're not the...biggest of them all, despite being the Chosen One."

"Oh really?" Harry glared at his friend. "At least I'm not a ginger. I hear they have no souls!"

Ron looked appalled and Harry removed the pink underwear and tossed them to him.

"You try them on, Mr. Jealous!"

Ron's ears went pink.

"Of course gingers have souls! Where in the world did you hear such a story?"

Harry grinned.

"Some Muggle cartoon my cousin Dudley was watching this past summer."

"Cartoon?" Neville spoke up. "What's a cartoon?"

"Um..." Harry struggled to find the right way to explain it. "It's sort of like a Chocolate Frog Card. You know, a picture that moves."

"Oh, so sort of like a moving painting?" Neville perked up. It was not easy for him to catch on so quick, and Harry nodded, exaggeratedly, to encourage his random spell of learning something new, yet completely useless information.

"Yes, like that. A moving painting, except usually they're pretty vulgar. Even the ones for children!"

"Ooh!" Neville rubbed his hands together. "I bet my Gran wouldn't let me watch them, but I would sneak them anyway!"

Finally Ron had the pink boxer-briefs on, and again, the effect was unmistakable.

"Wow, Ron!" Seamus said. "They actually managed to make you look good!"

"Thanks...I guess..." Ron took a seat on his bed. "It's funny, usually pink clashes with my red hair."

"You got that right!" said two voices in unison, and the group was shocked when they turned around to find Fred and George stepping out from beneath Harry's invisibility cloak.

They were laughing their arses off.

Fred pointed at the lot of them.

"What in Gringotts Bank are you gits doing?"


End file.
